What an exquisite essay. This site has opened my mind and helped me connect with a long overdue epiphany of my own. I have lived more or less Amar’s experiences. As him, I can say I have found a safe emotional place. I have recently met a man with whom I have developed a strong emotional connection. We both have families to take care of. We started to get to know each other step by step and just a few days ago he told me “I have found my safe place in you”. That was a powerful statement: I felt leaving behind a chapter of on-line searching to hooking up with an eventual and almost surely short-term sex partner. At a certain point, I realized I needed to take a step forward and accepted that my quest was to find a firm companion to start living my sexuality at its fullest. There are many lessons I have learnt in these last months: my attitudes towards sex can open up ample spaces of wisdom. Or else, I can shut myself in fear, guilt or an insane search of an impossible “somebody”. I can bloom my life into peace and happiness, or I can blame myself and the world for not being complete. I can create a new narrative of my own, leaving behind whatever tag I hanged to myself. I choose my life and I have the obligation to pursue happiness. Life is really short, and prejudices will not open any door. They are locks but me, only me, have the keys to free myself. I’m a man in my late 50’s, married 35+ years to an incredible woman. I have 3 daughters and a grandson. All of them are my joys. And I have a partner with whom I want to explore uncharted territory. My life is complete.


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