The various eras of Discovery & Astronomy, when scholars and students were gazing up but groping around, the eras of Enlightenment & Evolution, when a strapping, horny Alexander von Humboldt told Thomas Jefferson to abolish slavery, for god-fuckin’-sake, because you can’t treat someone inhumanly if you make love to her or him incessantly. Then Revolution and Industrialization really brought the boys to manhood and on cold nights every rebel was hoping to share a bed, nuts-to-butts. These centuries didn’t have words for things we love to do but they loved to do those, too–they had wet tongues and quivering a-holes and fuzzy forarms and hairy chests and wide, throbbing man bones, didn’t they? And the events of history all threw together men who were originally sent to defend a patch of Earth but the some of them must have found killing distasteful, and ploughing a mound of warm, vigorous flesh an even better harvest on the second voyage, which like all long journey# rarely encountered available women but frequently led to a lot of other cute guys with interesting box lunches. Mmmm. I’m thinking of the Turks and the Austrians meeting tonight, all hungry for affection and most lugging around an erection! Only problem? There’s too many for a simple selection. Hey, I’ll take two, of any complexion!

The glimpse, from a distance or even unobtrusive nearness, of stocky, furry men embracing or even kissing and fondling each other has been a common one in human history. I came to this near-certainty after reading texts from Greco-Roman Antiquity, when Emperors often had boy-lovers and soldiers were forbidden to marry while on military campaigns for 15 years sometimes. I read about the Medieval Christian Crusades and Islamic conquests, which sent thousands of sweaty, dark, hairy Mediterranean soldiers rampaging over hundreds of miles, claiming new worlds, and acquiring a twinkle for rosy-assed Celts and sandy-mopped Slavs. Throughout the entire sweep of Modernity, from the Renaissance, when Leonardo was arrested for sodomy, through the Ages of Exploration and Portuguese sailors met Japanese swordsmen, and the storied Mister Butterfly was launched in alpha version.

Denny Smith
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